Mourning the loss of my gandpa.

Short but sweet.

My grandpa Victor passed away this morning (26th July 2008) at 7:30AM.
I might be updating during this week. Just letting you know I'll be busy with uni, applications and of course, mourning with my family.

I love my grandpa very much and it's devastating to see him go. Please keep him in your prayers and that he may rest in peace.

Victor, we love you! Rest In Peace grandpa. =[

start of uni ... should i be stressed?

so the start of uni is starting this week. i don't know whether i should be stressing out or not.

still finishing off applications and everything.
i finally sent my friend sandra a package i was meaning to send to her like 6 months ago. made me feel pretty good. i've been so behind on catching up with keeping friends overseas. been pretty good with that and on the top of it all lately.

i'm not too sure if i'm sad or excited to start uni. due to the fact that i'll only have uni for another 6 months before i will be working fulltime (hopefully).

this is only a short entry saying that i'm fineeeee and i've just been pretty busy running in and out of the house.

other than that, i've done a little partying. a little this and that.
had my spanish exam on the tuesday. i'm pretty sure i did alright. it was pretty easy, kinda. not too bad.

anyway, i'd better run, clean my room a bit and then prepare for uni tomorrow and then seeing the boy. heh.

what a grand day.

First off. I PASSED MY EXAMS!!!!

Well, I still have another exam to go because I applied for Special Consideration as my exam as Clinical rotation clashed. So that exams rescheduled for the 22nd. (WHOO HOO Spanish!)

Anyway, todays just been an extrememly awesome day.
I woke up pretty stressed (7am-ish) because I was scared to look at my exam results (hah), then I ended up falling asleep again and waking up to my alarm clock, but snoozing while the radion was on and ended up waking up at 8:20AM. I then told myself to check my results and I PASSSSSED. Well, it says I failed Spanish, but I haven't sat for it yet until next week. Stupid people.

But I can't believe I past. I've been stressing out thinking that I failed my ass off on my exams.

Ok, so Brenton and I have been dating for 8 days now. It's going pretty smoothly. I met 2 of his friends last night (they're siblings) and they live in what he calls "The Nutbean House". Basically because the people that live there are 2 brothers and a sister and their last name is Nutbean. Hehe. Pretty awesome people though. So they're tre cool.

So I ended up staying over his place for almost 11 hours haha. Had lunch together. (Lebanese pizza) and then for dinner, Brenton made me try this Indian Chicken (Sorry forgot the name, something like Buddy Chicken or something) and IT WAS FREAKIN' AWESOME! I've never actually had a lot of Indian food because I don't really like spicy food. I can't handle it! hah. But this chicken was extremely delicious!

Eeeek. Picking up my NEW CK glasses. Edit this laaaaater!!!

Anyway, so yeah, new CK glasses are totally rad. Been organising the hospitals and everything that I will be applying to and such. I have roughly 3 hospitals in mind. I know I should be applying to places that are new and shit, but I mean, there's only like 2 hospitals here that are close to me and the 3rd one thats close to me, means I have to withdraw from all the other hospitals. If I don't get that hospital than I'm screwed.

So, yeah today, I might be deciding today, and tomorrow, writing the resumes and cover letters.
I want to apply to St. Vincent and Peter Mac. I just hope I dont see Adam at Peter Mac. We kinda of dated ... for not even that long at all. Hah. We didn't kiss or anything. I guess more just hang out to be honest. But meh, who cares if I do see him. It was a while ago. I'm over it.

Anyway, almost 10AM. I should get up and start doing something. Todays weather isnt as good as yesterdays sun. :]

i don't understand some people.

For a person that is pretty sensitive and emotional, some words people can say to you can be pretty damn hurtful, especially when you haven't done anything wrong to them. Better yet, you don't even know them.

I guess, we'll always have people like that in the world. we all have feelings. If you don't like something. keep it to yourself.

See, it was my 22nd birthday. My friends organised a party for me because usually every year I don't do anything.
Even for my 21st. It's suppose to be the biggest, since you're now considered an adult... what was i doing? nothing. i was still on clinical rotation over in my psych placement on my 21st. i came home to nothing made. no special food to celebrate my day. nothing. even better, nobody was home to say "happy 21st" to me. my birthday has pretty much been like that probably since i was 16-17.

now, for 22. i get lashed out as being "miserable" because they took it as I had the best night ever because i was drunk.

yeah, lash out at me again over this entry, but i sure need to vent out how pissed off and upset i am.

and this person wrote to me before asking what god meant to me and i never replied.
for a person thats been through a lot in her life, you develop mixed feelings about everything, even your own religion where you thought God wasn't there for you. even now, i'm trying to sort my troubled self out and trying to find God in my life. Troubled doesn't mean i'm screaming at everyone, telling them to " 'Eff off". I'm not like that. When I need time to myself, I just withdraw.

I'm a pretty strong believer of Karma. I don't like drama. I avoid it when I can (hence why when this person wrote back to me, i left it). But I did report it. I don't stand for people talking down to me. Well, sometimes I do. Hah. But this was on a religious site. Where you can report when people give you shit over some little thing you did. I didn't get drunk and vandalised anything. I dind't get drunk and beat someone up. I didn't drink and drive. I was with great friends that took care of me.

So for this person, I did write back saying:
"Excuse me? You don't know me. And you claim I'm miserable because of it? Excuse me if I have a life. Excuse me if was my birthday. Excuse me if I've never known what it felt like to be drunk.It was the best day ever because I was with my closest friends that have been there through thick and thin.Seriously, people like you, I don't like. So get it through your head that it was the best birthday ever because I've finally found friends that won't turn their backs on me. SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "

Urgh, I'm just trying to calm myself down now with some Ben Harper.

saturday was the best day ever!

Left: Dianne. Right: Moi. A bit tipsy by now. On our way to the club.

ok, so i haven't updated in 2 weeks i think, but so much to tell you.



saturday was my 22nd birthday party. absolutely killer party. I had it at a club called "Word". It's an event called "SoulClap". Funny thing is, my ex Sebastian was at the club. HAHAHA. Small freaking world! Anyway he ignored me. I ignored him. Plus, I was with another guy. He's called Brenton. We've been talking for a few weeks and we saw each other for the first time on Saturday. Bad timing since I was completely "smooshed" faced. Anyway, he would have probably seen me making out with Brenton anyway! Like full on making out. Haha. But oh well. Good Seb saw because he's an asshole. But loved it when he and his friend were looking at me. hahahaha! Dianne pointed my ex out to me when it was around 11. Haha. We ended up leaving just after 4am or something like that.

So yeah, Brenton came along. Which was really good. I saw him last night as well and I'm seeing him again tonight. He's cooking me dinner. :) And we totally have so much in common, its funny. We laugh at the same random things. Like totally random stuff. We love the same music. He has awesome clothes. Hah. But it's still new. So we'll see how it all goes. :] Hopefully it will last longer than a month!

I don't really remember much on what happened because I was completely wasted, but I do remember I threw up. But everything else is pretty much a blur to me. I mean, I was allowed to get completely off my face for one night in the whole year. It was my 22nd. I'm getting older every year.

So my hangover on the Sunday was a pretty damn bad one as well. I was so sick and I even went to work. Like seriously. By the time I got home, I lay in bed, got up because i thought i was going to throw up, so went to the toilet. Nothing happened. Decided to wash my face and ended up throwing up in the sink. So bad. But I spoke to Brenton online and ended up having a nap while he went to soccer practise. I napped until 6pm and woke up to have a shower. I was feeling way better than before, but I still had a bit of a headache. I picked Brenton up from his friends place and went back to mine. We didn't do anything, for all you people thinking dirty lol. We ended up watching National Geographic on some ships that have sunk. Like Titanic and the Andrea Dora, then we decided it was too late so I took him home because he was being a sleepy head. Heh. But totally cute.

So today, I woke up and felt sooooooooo much better. Ended up sleeping once I got home from dropping Brenton off. So around 1am and woke up at 9:30. Heh. I had work, which was still good. I got some free clothing out of it from my clients wife. Haha. Really really cool vintage looking skirt from Italy and jeans that I might give to my mum. I tend to wear skinny jeans and they look like they're straight leg.

Anyway, other news. My poppa is in the hospital (again) :[ But last time he was in hospital (Northern ... where I had my clinical placement), he was only in MAPU. Which is kinda like short stay. Now, he's in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU). =[ which is pretty sad because he's been unwell for a while now. and my aunts with him in hospital, which is good because she's a nurse.

i just hope pop doesnt die anytime soon. my cousin liza is over in america having a holiday with her boyfriend. wouldnt want that to be ruined with them having to come home early. i hope he can make it til christmas. it would be grand if he did. i love my pops.

Anyway, I think this should stop now. I'm feeling a bit tired, but I can't nap because I have an appointment with the optometrist in around an hour to get myself new glasses. About time too. My pair has been through a lot in 4 years ahah. It's actually pretty uneven as well.

Oh well. Maybe i should nap!? Hmm, perhaps.